Hot Rod Lincoln
by Artemis 85
Summary: Yeah another songfic, i don't own naruto or this song. Shino, Gaara, Sakura, Sasuke, Choji, Shikamaru, Kankuro, Akamaru and of course Kiba! T cuz of bad language


A/N: hey guys, what up? This is a songfic of Kiba and a few of the awesome guys in Naruto that I will probably pick when I really get into writing this story, one of which will be Shino cuz he rocks my socks...okay got em': Shino, Kiba, Naruto, Kankuro and Shikamaru. Yeah...yeah that should rock your socks off.

A/N: YES I OWN NARUTO MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...you must be stupid, if I did own naruto, It would probably be R18 and extremely dodgy.

...put that in your bong and smoke it bitch!

Kiba was driving his fucking sexy lincoln. Naruto was sitting next to him, Shino, Shikamaru and Kankuro were sitting in the back, all being total stoners. Kiba was just cruising, elbow out the window, one arm on the wheel, Naruto stuck his head out the window like a dog and Akamaru was...just sleeping, cuz he rocks. Shino was taking huge hits on his joint as though it was a second oxygen and he passed it back and fourth between him and Kankuro. Shikamaru just sat there singing the. Troublesome song.

"My life is so troublesome" it doesn't really have a tune, he just made it up as he went. "My parents are so troublesome, and theres a bunch of troublesome girls chasing me, cuz I'm dead sexy for my own damn self" That's right Shika, sing you fucking heart out. "Sometimes, even though it's troublesome, I want to pull out a knife and cut my wrists, but the pain and the blood would be too troublesome, and it would be too troublesome having everyone call me emo."

He sung that quietly as he stroked Akamaru and looked at his reflection in the mirror. He's soooo conceited.

The road they were driving on had just been re-sealed so heaps of shingle came up and pelted Naruto in the head, not like he's going to loose anymore braincells anyway. Maybe an eye or two though.

"Hey guys" Kiba turned on his sweet Tape player, yes that's how poor he was. "How bout' some tunes?" He slipped a totally ripped tape into the slot and tapped his fingers on the wheel and the music started playing.

_My pappy said, "Son, you're gonna' drive me to drinkin' If you don't stop drivin' that Hot Rod Lincoln"_

Shino started bobbing his head cuz he was so out of it, awesome. Kankuro had a coughing fit and nearly swallowed his joint and Shikamaru said "Troublesome."

Kiba laughed and Akamaru barked along to the song.

_Have you heard this story of the Hot Rod Race When Fords and Lincolns was settin' the pace That story is true, I'm here to say I was drivin' that Model A_.

Naruto pulled out a bottle of Jim Beam out of no-where and guzzled it down, he started off tipsy, he leant out the window and screamed his guts out, just because he felt like it and that's how he rolls.

_It's got a Lincoln motor and it's really souped up That Model A body makes it look like a pup It's got eight cylinders, uses them all It's got overdrive, just won't stall_.

Kiba changed gears and pumped it into cruise, he tapped his finger of the wheel again and he unruley brown locks fluttered around in the wind of the open window. He sighed and wriggled in his seat. This was the life for him, hanging out with the guys, no problems, it's all good.

_With a 4-barrel carb and a dual exhaust With 4.11 gears you can really get lost It's got safety tubes, but I ain't scared The brakes are good, tires fair_.

He lit up a smoke, it sat helplessly between his lips, he enhaled and puffed out the smoke through he nose. He breathed out a shaky sigh and shook out his tense muscles. The rest of the guys were calming down, Shino was eating the car seat cuz he had the massive munchies, Kankuro kept staring at his hands and turing them over. He waved his hand through the air.

"You know the weird thing about air?" He said, still looking at his hand.

"What?" Shino asked, trying to eat the foam poppin' out of the seats.

"It's there, but it's not really there, y'know?" Yup still wavving his hand throught the air.

"Yeah, I totally get you man"

"And you know the funny thing, air is so big but yet it has such a little name...air" He laughed insanely.

"Lol" Said Shikamaru, stroking the dog evilly.

"Did you just say lol?" Shino asked.

"It's too troublesome to laugh"

_Pulled out of San Pedro late one night The moon and the stars was shinin' bright We was drivin' up Grapevine Hill Passing cars like they was standing still_.

Kiba flicked his Cigarette bud out the window and checked his fuel gage.

_All of a sudden in a wink of an eye A Cadillac sedan passed us by I said, "Boys, that's a mark for me" By then the tail light was all you could see_

Suddenly Gaara who was driving his caddy, with Sasuke, Choji, Ino and Sakura crammed in it, sped past. Sasuke with his great timing threw a huge fart bomb through Kibas window, into the back seat.

"SON OV A-" the fart bomb went off with a lound bang and a green gas filled the car.

"Shikamaru why didn't you do something?" Kankuro asked "It landed in your freaking lap dude!"

"...Too troublesome"

Everyone sighed.

Kiba glared at the Caddy speedy down the desserted dessert road.

"Dude don't let those butt-fucks do that to us do something!" Kankuro smacked Kiba in the back of his head with one of his puppets arms.

"Yeah" Shino and Shikamaru said in unison.

_Now the fellas was ribbin' me for bein' behind So I thought I'd make the Lincoln unwind Took my foot off the gas and man alive I shoved it on down into overdrive_.

For once Kiba agreed with the three idiots, the fourth was currently spewing his gut up out the window, well atlest he didn't do it inside the car I guess. Kiba stood on the gas and watched the speedo go higher and high, oh, oh we got our selves a case of led foot.

_Wound it up to a hundred-and-ten My speedometer said that I hit top end My foot was glued like lead to the floor That's all there is and there ain't no more_.

The guys were starting to get freaked out, they were way past the road speed and the shingle from the newly sealed road was hitting the wind shield.

"Dude?" Shino said, yes he is very OOC today.

Kiba ignored him. And just went faster. They all started yelling like pussys when the pin reached 90 miles per hour.

_Now the boys all thought I'd lost my sense And telephone poles looked like a picket fence They said, "Slow down! I see spots! The lines on the road just look like dots"._

Kiba quickly swirved around a corner, and went down the inside of two trucks. The guys in the back and Naruto were screaming, Even Shikamaru's eyes were open to a troublesome degree.

_Took a corner, sideswiped a truck Crossed my fingers just for luck My fenders was clickin' the guardrail posts The guy beside me was white as a ghost._

The guy in one of the trucks was staring wide-eyed at the blur of a car.

_Smoke was comin' from out of the back When I started to gain on that Cadillac Knew I could catch him, I thought I could pass Don't you know by then we'd be low on gas _

Kiba snapped out of his road rage and noticed the smoke billowing from the back.Kiba started laughing maniacly.

_We had flames comin' from out of the side Feel the tension, man, what a ride! I said, "Look out, boys, I've got a license to fly" And that Caddy pulled over and let us by_

They Past Gaara in his Caddy, who stared with his mouth in his lap. Saskue Fixed that for him...that sounded dodgy. The boys had new admirers as well when the girls looked at them with hearts in thier eyes.

"**_WHOOO HOOOOO!!!"_** Kiba screamed ou the window.

_Now all of a sudden she started to knockin' And down in the dips she started to rockin' I looked in my mirror; a red light was blinkin' The cops was after my Hot Rod Lincoln_

"**_WEEE, OOOO, WEEE, OOO!"_** surely enough the cops had pulled out of no-where. Kiba's car blew a gasket before it went careening off the road and into the long grass. Naruto who was so drunk he couldn't walk in a straight line to save himself and his family. Tripped over his own feet and fell face first into a pile of smeely cow shit...yum yum. Shino tried shoving the crack, the bongs and the lighters up his ass, knowing he'd get put away for having it. Kankuro was still looking at his hands, turning them over, murmuring about how big they were. And I think Shikamaru just shat his undies.

_They arrested me and they put me in jail And called my pappy to throw my bail And he said, "Son, you're gonna' drive me to drinkin' If you don't stop drivin' that Hot Rod Lincoln!"_

A few hours later Kiba found himself grinning up at his dad, who was scolding him for being so retarded.

"It was fun though, I'd do it again too" His dad bitch slapped him and dragged him out of the police station by the ear and threw him into his car.

"Get in" His dad said.

Kiba was feeling pretty lucky so why not "...Can I drive?"

"YOU MUST BE STUPID, SUICIDAL AND ON DRUGS TO SAY THAT!" he got a dozen bitch slapps and a ratchet over the head.

Shino shuffled all the was home with all sorts of objects crammd up his ass. Akamaru got a career i the porn industry. Naruto woke on a street curb with a very sore ass, somewhere Sasuke was very happy. Kankuro wrote an autobiograpy and Shikamaru became a total pimp. All the ladies were after him.

A/N: sorry for any spelling errors, I got a new computer and it has diffrent progames on it so yeah, i'm getting around to update it.


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